My-bus-arrived-at-school-30-minutes-early-so-I'm-grabbing-a-coffee-before-classThoughts

Am I the only one that looks around and thinks "wow, that girl is wearing sweatpants and a baggy shirt and is rocking it. I actually tried to look nice today and I feel like a slob"?

I know the answer is no, I'm not the only one who thinks like this, in fact I know it's perfectly likely that a stranger might think I look nicer than them today. Except probably not, because in my sleepy stupor leaving the house at 6:30 this morning I forgot to not wear my grey boots with my grey leggings and long grey socks so that my look isn't called 15 shades of grey. 

The even more likely outcome is that no one else will even notice my attire on their personal journeys through today. Even if they did, I'm never going to know if someone has that thought. And they'll never know what I think. 

So why do I care so much??!? 

Death by cookie dough

So I have come to the conclusion that if I were ever to become terminally ill, I would like to be provided copious amounts of raw cookie dough to eat until my body literally can't take it anymore, and I go into a coma and just fade away, full of cookie dough. Yup. That's the dream. 

No, getting to eat that much cookie dough and NOT die and NOT gain 50 pounds. That's the dream. 

NO. Owning the worlds largest cookie dough plant and getting to literally swim in cookie dough, and be able to eat as much of it as I physically can without any of the negative health effects. That is the dream. 

Paper Towns Book Review... actually more of a discussion than a review

I read TFIOS in the summer and fell in love with John Green's writing style. His contemporary storylines and captivating characters are so easy to get into; when I pick up one of his books I can't put it down until I'm done.
(Anecdote: my friend Shelby lent me a copy of the book, and it was sitting in my purse at work. When I went on my break I found that there was a full latte that someone had left in the back dumped over, upside down inside my purse. It completely destroyed the book, but nothing much else, thank goodness. But the pages rae all still readable and not stuck together... so now it just looks badass, like it's been through a lot.)
After TFIOS I read Looking for Alaska, which was a great book, but it didn't resonate with me in the same way Paper Towns did. I think a huge reason for this is one of the big themes in Paper Towns- letting your imagination deceive you. Q has an imaginary version of Margo Roth Spiegelman in his mind, but comes to realize that his false understanding of Margo is only leading him farther from her. Literally, in his search for her, and figuratively, in his quest to try to understand her. There is no way for one human to imagine their way into really being and understanding another human. He can only see her as well he perceives her. The problem is that he perceives her to be some kind of supergirl of higher intelligence and ability than is even remotely realistic. He learns not to let his imagined idea of Margo Roth Spiegelman spoil the real Margo Roth Spiegelman for him. A similar incidence happens with his best friend Ben. They fight and argue because Ben repeatedly lets Q down, and Q repeatedly lets Ben down, until Radar points out to them that the only reason for their disappointment is expecting the other to be someone that they're not. Once Q learns to love Ben for being Ben, instead of hating Ben for not being what he is not, their friendship is mended.
Why is this relevant to me? Because I tend to have really high expectations. I assume things will happen because I think they should, and they never really work out that way. Particularly with people- my friends and family.  I'm learning to let go of my expectations, because the person who said "expect nothing, and you will never be disappointed" was absolutely right. If you expect nothing at all, you can only be happily surprised. If your expectations are constantly too high, you will constantly be let down.
Now that's not to say all expectations are bad. There's just something to be said for realizing which ones are realistic and healthy, and which ones will only cause you pain.

today, I made a blog

I was chopping up tomatoes and cucumbers and cooking quinoa about five minutes ago when I decided that it was time to have a blog.
I think some pretty funny and creative things, and I think I should be documenting them. I'm too lazy to write everything on paper, but I can type pretty fast. And watching the words come up on the screen almost as fast as I think them is a lot more satisfying than slowing sounding them out in my head as I scrawl out my thoughts on paper. I'd still be writing the word quinoa if I was manually writing in a journal.
I have no specific intentions for this blog, other than making posts about whatever I'm thinking about that day. I'm thinking it will be kind of like a journal, but with a lot of extra stuff. Like with book or music reviews, a random thoughts, million dollar ideas, a funny stories, whatever I feel like. So if you're reading this, don't expect anything from me. Not that *I* am expecting anyone to even be reading this. But who knows, maybe I'll become super famous and you'll be reading this 10 years in the future because you're super fangirling/fanboying over me and you are checking every single result that comes up when you type my name in on google because you want to know every little detail about my life. If that's the case, that is super awesome. I personally and genuinely thank you for being a fan of mine. and if you're a friend or family member of mine that is reading my blog because you want to know what's up with me, or maybe I made you read it, thank you! I love you!
Today is January 29, 2015. (I definitely typed 2014 first, because it will probably take me most of this year to get used to it being 2015 and not 2014. and then it will be 2016 and the vicious cycle of confusion will never end.) This morning, I woke up at 4am for absolutely no reason, but touched my nose and realized that my ring was missing. I just got my nose pierced about a month ago, so chances were good that if the ring had been out for more than a few hours, some skin would have grown over again. I ran upstairs and tried to put another ring back in, and almost blacked out. I kid you not, I have never been so freaking dizzy and nauseous in my life, I thought I was dying. I stumbled back downstairs and lay back down in bed, unsuccessful in repiercing my nose. When my alarm went off 2 hours later, I tried again to stab a shiny piece of metal into my face, and almost passed out again. But this time I did it before nearly blacking out. In retrospect, I think the sensation of pushing metal through my own skin was what was making me black out, but I was pretty freaked out at the time.
So anyway, that was my morning. My day was a lot better after that. After Education 100, I had coffee with a friend from school that I met in concert band, Michelle! She's an international student from China. She's probably the sweetest person I've ever met. And now I'm making my lunch and writing my new blog. I actually had the idea earlier on the bus when I finished the book Paper Towns by John Green, because I wanted to write a post about it and discuss it with myself. So I think I'll make a post about that later today.